For as long as I can remember, I’ve yearned to live a well-balanced life. I want to be smart and successful. Healthy and happy. Fun-loving and helpful. Solitude and a sense of community. And I want my house clean and my life organized, too!

But recent health issues have forced me to take a hard look at my habits over the years and upon deep reflection, I’ve come to realize two things:

1. I’ve been trying way too hard for way too long to achieve some impossible measure of balance. Discipline. Time management. Goal setting. Habit trackers.

None of which were ever sustainable because I always set the bar too high and my expectations too rigid. Or I simply tried to be the best at everything all the time, never willing to lower my standards and rarely asking for help.

2. The true art of balance, however, is getting super clear on what really matters, living with intention, and learning to ebb and flow with grace and gratitude.

I’ve put this new mindset to practice the last two months, and already I feel much happier, calmer, and more focused. My energy is better and I’ve been more productive with far less effort. I’ve been more present and playful with my son and husband. More connected with friends and family. More aligned with my true self. And my recent health issues have started to significantly improve.

All of these positive changes started after I let go of my overly rigid ways of thinking, planning, striving… and embraced a new perspective of balance instead.

First, I got super clear on what really matters. My health and my family.

Not my job. Not organizing my house. Not micromanaging our money or trying to track 20 habits everyday. Not even my passion projects.

Being a healthy, happy mother & wife who takes care of herself and her family is now my only “top” priority for each new day.

Two, I started living with intention. I’m actually prioritizing and doing the things I needed and wanted to do to improve my health and show up as my best self for my family. Not merely thinking about it and making a pretty plan in my journal that would soon be forgotten when life and work became busy.

Three, I’m learning to ebb and flow with grace and gratitude. I’ve finally come to realize that it’s impossible to balance everything all the time. But it is quite possible to balance what really matters when you live each day with clear intention and focused attention.

I’ve also come to learn that balance doesn’t mean doing it all perfectly each day. Sure, I’d like to take a half hour walk each morning but 20 minutes of playing chase with my little boy is also good for the body and soul. Maybe even better!

But here’s where the grace and gratitude has made a shining difference…

Instead of feeling frustrated that I wasn’t able to get out for my morning walk for whatever reason (maybe my husband had an early errand or it’s just too windy), I now take a deep breath and remind myself it’s more than okay. I am grateful for the extra playtime with my son before my work day starts, and so is my son.

And guess what, I can just go for a walk later in the day or tomorrow or the next day. I simply no longer care how many days I get out for a daily walk. That was my old rigid way of thinking. I now only care about what really matters… moving my body in a healthy way everyday whether that’s a walk, jog, yoga, or playing with my little boy.

Because what really matters is my health and family. And my intention is clear. Make aligned choices that support my health and family no matter the daily circumstances. And when the weather is nice and the timing works out, get outside and enjoy that half hour walk and be grateful for that as well.

I have been applying this new mindset to just about every facet of life, especially in terms of daily routines and responsibilities. And here’s the amazing part… Not only is my health improving and my connection with family blooming, I’m managing to get all the other little stuff done, too. And with far less effort than ever before. Work, bills, chores, etc. I’ve even starting cooking more and helping with our yard & garden activities. And, I decided to finally start writing. Something I’ve had a calling to do for well over a decade.

And the very best part… I feel truly happy. I feel more relaxed, content, and at peace with myself. More than that, I feel a deep sense of gratitude. For my health and all my circumstances, the good and challenging. I am quite simply in love with my family and the life we are creating together. Even if I did try way too hard the past 20 years, and even if that did take a toll on my health these past few years, I’m grateful for this new perspective on life. I have finally learned to slow down, savor these precious moments, and go with the flow. Everything is and will be more than okay if I just focus on what really matters and live each day with clear intention and a deep sense of gratitude.

I’m going to keep sharing all the big little ways I’m redefining balance to prioritize my health and bloom into the best version of myself so I become the vibrant mother, wife, and friend I’ve always longed to be.

With love and gratitude, Heather